ENCOURAGING THUNDER AWARD:

ET

Wow! This is my first award 😀 and it came from my dear friend Asad like ” A drop of honey before you die”. yeah, i have been in a tumultuous phase of my life. A lots of problems and downs in my life and this award is like “you are not abandoned. come on, my dear friend”. so kind of you Afmai for giving me this. you made my year man!

PURPOSE OF MY BLOGGING:

  • To write my heart out when i have none to hear,
  • To articulate my feelings be it be joy or sorrow, words heal me!
  • To be loved and to love,
  • To tell my story and listen to others
  • To escape from hard times of my life

FURTHER NOMINEES:

RULES FOR ACCEPTING THE AWARD:

  • Post in your blog
  • nominate further bloggers
  • thank the one who nominated you
  • Add the encouraging thunder logo
  • And write why you write.

LET THE BEAUTY OF WHAT YOU LOVE BE WHAT YOU DO AND LET’S SPREAD THE MAGIC OF WORDS EVERYWHERE 🙂 😀

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A LETTER TO MY MOM :)

I know today is not mother’s day. But there need not have to be some special days to cherish the people whom you love the most. Yeah, this is a post for my mom , for all the moms who have their lives and loves only for their kids. Better to start this post with these line ,

“There is a cord between us yet not cut,

On it we like tight rope walkers novices,

Uncertain of the net take tentative steps across the gulf,

Towards one another careful,

Not wishing to turn back hopeful,

That keeping balance we can meet,

Can embrace and pass each other as we must. ”

Most of the time , I misunderstood and i thought that i and you (my mom) have absolutely nothing in common.

I thought we are total opposites..But that doesn’t mean I don’t love you. I obviously do but sometimes I feel that you doesn’t understand why I’m not still afraid of boys, why I don’t tell you everything and why I remain cool even at important times. I thought my friends knew me better . I like to chat with my friends more, get up and sleep off in social networking sites. but you don’t. sometimes i thought you never understand my feelings. so , i went to my friends for advice and consolance and i thought they kept me alive. but after having this convo with you today , i understood i am wrong . (the conversation between me and my mom..here it goes: )

ME:  mom…(she was in the kitchen) so what are you doing now?

MOM: don’t know? you asked me potato crisps na? i’m ripping off it’s skin. god should not put me in hell for tearing the skin of a poor creature. (she laughs at her own joke (!!!!) ).

ME: poor mom..potatoes won’t cry when you peel it’s skin. they have no feelings. (yeah , kids speak like they know more scientific stuffs than their moms)

MOM: so what? if they don’t cry it doesn’t mean they don’t feel pain!. you remember what happened when you go off to granny’s home leaving your rose plant unwatered? it didn’t bloom for the next half month. even these creatures also feel pains, separations and all . (moms speak philosophically better when their kids take on them scientifically)

i wanted to ask my mom that one question for which i have been in her kitchen .

ME: so , mom have you ever dreamt of doing something great in life? have you ever had a strong passion for doing anything in your life?

MOM: (looking at me puzzled) what? dreams? you mean those we have when we sleep? (ok, my mom acts better)

ME: mo..m… stop your silly jokes. (yeah i lost my temper) do you ever had dreams about what you wanted to do in your life? (i wanted to decipher what my mom wanted to do all her life )

MOM: umm… yeah!!! I wanted to see my daughter as a successful surgeon and i also dreamt that my daughter should be the first person from my family to reach the stars and there should come a day where she speaks and the rest listen to her….

ME: mom…i asked have you ever dreamt anything for you? don’t you wish to do something great in your life? (I wonder how mom lives without a dream for her? how could be there some people without any passion or thirst for doing great? )

MOM: well. dream of me/ dream for me? I always dream that my kids and husband should be in the pink of health.

I also wish that i should be in the position to serve them all my life and…..

ME: mom…stop it! (yeah..i lost it completely) why you care for people like this? just understand you have only one life and go live it..and here you are…you don’t have a single dream or passion that you want to do in your life?

MOM: (still maintaining all her calm) well…if dreamt is about one’s self..then , i want to be the mother of….the proud mother of a girl who will do great things in her life. I want to be the proud wife of a man who will stand as living example for all other dads on this earth. these are my dreams..i never dreamt anything for me separately . you are my concern and my dream that i never wanted to get off from it .

She looked at me innocently checking my face whether i’m satisfied with her answer.

ME: (can’t even utter a single word to her. just came back from the kitchen with tears welling up in my eyes)

well there is popular quote “I never believe in love at first sight at first , cause I love my mom since i opened my eyes”.

even i didn’t believe how can a person just live all their life for others? i thought it requires a lots of sacrifice..but when my mom told me that answer. it all become clear to me that “real joy and  fun lies when we live for others” .

yeah, a wannabe proud mom she is and now i’m the poor who never understood the valuable possession she had. By this fall i moving away far for my studies. i know none will love , care , protect me like the way you did. there will be none to look deep into my eyes to find out the truth when my lips just utter the fake words “hey..i’m ok”. none will understand my feelings like the way you did. you made me realise how awesome it is to be loved by someone special like you.The things i knew about you are less when compared with those stuffs that i knew about my friends. I spent tons of time with my friends to hear their hanky-panky stories but never ade time to hear your dreams. the only thing that i wanna tell you now is not “sorry” but:

“mom..Thank you for being a good wife to my dad.

Thank you for being a good daughter to my grand pa,

Thank you for being my mom and making “me” as “ME”.

I don’t know whether i can be a better mom like you or not but i contribute my part in fulfilling your dreams – A PROUD MOTHER. ”

PS: i love you a lot mom and i will miss you every moment when i’m not with you. hugs and loves.

mommy

QUIRKY TWO-LINERS

1) Uncle loves me so much. Sometimes, it’s painful.

2) “You’re as comforting as a cigarette.” “But I’m burning.

3)Pregnancy Test: Positive.
Sonography Report: Normal.
Sex: Female. Abortion.

4) “All my toys are yours“,
read her brother’s death note.

5) The fool didn’t know, it was impossible.
So he achieved.

6) “Born to such rich parents, this boy has some life”, exclaimed the neighbours.

Somewhere in heaven, three unborn sisters cried

7) She was very excited today, after-all the school was re-opening after long summer break.Now, once again she can start selling the stationery at traffic signal to feed her family.

8) S(he)  Be(lie)ve(d)

9) Once a 5 year old boy was standing barefooted  in the shallow water of the ocean…He was repeating the same sentence to the waves – “Even if you touch my feet a thousand times, I won’t forgive you for taking my parents away“.

10) “Don’t go out now. It’s not safe. You don’t know how cruel men are”,said the husband to his wife who was about to step out of the house.
She smiled sardonically looking at him with a swollen eye  turned blue black, his gift to her  from the night before and asked “How much worse can they be?”.

11) “I don’t want to go to school anymore, Mom. The students hate me, and the teachers think I’m stupid.”
“But, sweetie, you have to. You’re the principal.”

12) It was a tight place, she tried to squeeze in to – no room for her, she realized eventually.He was too full of himself.

13)My son is trapped in a women’s Body.
Yes my wife is pregnant.

14)  She cut open her husband’s body, washed and sterilized the knife and cleaned the blood that flew out on the table before the police inspector came.
Then she drew out the form from her desk and wrote in cause of death: Infection in pulmonary arteries and signed as the Prosector.

15) The wet kiss that she planted on my cheek as I entered our home brought a wide smile on my face, in spite of the horrid time I’d had at work today.

I picked her in my arms and showered her face with kisses – my daughter Anwesha was growing up to be quite a good girl, in spite of her father having rejected both her mother and herself at birth. 

PS: These two liners are not my own 🙂 Found these awesome two-line stories from #quora.com  so courtesy goes to awesome #quoraians who framed this from various places 🙂

IT FEELS GOOD :)

l 2

BOY:  when you jerk your hair and free rains with the towel,

it feels good.

when those drizzling drops from your hair falls on my cheek

it feels good
when you move your lips slowly and talk musically,

it feels good.

GIRL:   Don’t fool me with your talks, come straight to the point,
see me in the eye and say, what you want?

Don’t wander dreams, wake up

tell me in short,
come straight to the point.

BOY : I put on that smell of your memory till my head,

I leave my wandering breath to hum on your street,
When you open the windows and do new beginnings
it feels good.

When you look at me at the corner of your eyes,

And hide your smile,

It feels good.

GIRL:  Don’t wander  in the streets, you are going crazy,
don’t keep confusing me, what do you want?
I know you’re emotional, now show me some action too,
tell me in short,
come straight to the point, come straight to the point

BOY:  It seems that you don’t like me, you don’t feel the same way as I do,

It doesn’t feel good.

GIRL:  I love the way you keep following me,

I love to see your face daily when i open my windows in my street,

I love to hear your hummings that you sing for me,

I love to hear those beautiful words from your awesome lips,

Why are you not coming straight to the point?

BOY:   oh yeah! I was breathing, but I was never alive, giving you the heart, I got familiar with heartbeats, I’m lost in you,             all lost in you only,now where else do I have to go from your doorstep, coming back to the point

Will you be my moon in my sky? It makes me feel good.

GIRL:  You never come to the point, I could see you never draw your point, And couldn’t you catch the point in girl’s                 heart? anyway It feels good…. you feel good. 😛

PS: I was hearing to my favourite song “achcha lagta hai”..This is a simple thought arised out of me from this song

“achcha lagta hai” is from hindi and it means “It feels good” 😀

l 3

A BEAUTIFUL MIND

was 2

“You seem very young…new to work?” , I asked reluctantly,

“yeah…but I can handle this. Shall we start?”, she replied confidently with her eyes wide

Of course, I couldn’t deny ‘A beautiful sylph’ she is,

What a statuesque beauty without any flaws!  I appreciated the creator for his wonderful creation,

“Time is fleeting..so is your money…let’s get started”, her naïve voice beamed me,

“But….”I dragged wondering how to fill the gap in my sentence and mind,

“Shouldn’t I ask you some questions?”, I ended my sentence waiting for her reply,

“Is that for what you hired me? Let’s get started”, her voice mellow this time,

I was extremely startled at her passion that she had for her work,

“Yeah..i hired you. so let me ask some..”, I let my words beseech her,

I squinted at her face to know what she was going to say,

Alas! I made a mistake because my eyes never looked away then,

Her eyelids rolled a full 360 commanding me to ask,

“Why you chose this field to work?”, well… my question made me relax,

“Because this is what I was given to do”. She answered repulsively,

I could say I made her upset,

Silence brood between us for minutes before it could develop, I suppressed it,

“Sorry..i’ll stop probing if you want”, I wanted to comfort her,

“You hired me…so you can ask questions, make me work or whatever …”,

No 19 years old girl wants to be questioned like this, I thought,

“Okay…I think I’ve made you uncomfortable. if you want let’s start”,

As eyes of her told,”my discomfort is not ‘cause of you”, My mind baffled,

With moon floating, birds tweeting, my heart beating, her eyes showered,

“Sorry..but what had happened?”, my words blurted out,

“Nothing. this work gives me jitters like it was new…a little intimidation”, her tone is irresistible,

“First time?”, I asked though it was my first time. “No…but feeling like it is..” she paused,

“I was given this job when i was 12”, “12 years? you are bloody young at that age”,

I jumped at her last sentence, But what else a 12 years old could do at that age,

When rich girls of her age were going to school, boys of her were playing near,

She took that job as she was no rich girl nor a boy,

Though she wished she could be one among them,

But to look after dying mother and to help her elder sister reduce her burden,

She had to work and that’s what she did or she was made to do,

Hands of her now trembled with drops that fell from her eyes,

I wanted to know what was in that beautiful face inside,

“Hey! I’ve hired you..so do what I say”, the man in me shouted,

Her eyes that were swollen due to sobbing told me,”that was what I told you first…”,

Men lived centuries ago blamed God for showing partiality by making women look great,

But God replied ’em ,”To test Men’s weakness…I’ve made Women beautiful”

And this 19 year old maiden is testing my weakness..no longer could i bear,

“Tell me about your family and if alright the reason behind your tears..I’ve paid”,

“That’s not what people who come here ask me to do”, she looked me enigmatically,

“Ohh..But i want you to…answer mine” I looked curiously looked at her bright face which had hidden deep dark secrets, “You want to know about my dad who died at young?or My mom who is dying everyday due to lack of treatment?”

The only solace I’ve now is my sister , very smart she is, Her eyes twinkled brighter than midnight star,

“And girls like me have no awesome past nor decent present..so ASK ME NOT”

Tears in her eyes subsided as smile peered at the corner of her lips,

“Feeling okay now? so your sister is living a nice life, huh?”

“No.she didn’t .and i am not okay never will be I”, her eyes showered again,

The same god who created beautiful women made a lock to her heart without any keys,

I wished i would have  had that to open the heart of a girl with “beautiful face”,

“They promised , if i work here as they say, my sister will live a nice life..

But it was yesterday night,I found her doing the same work and yea i was cheated”.

Tears didn’t stop nor her words.Women always want someone to open their locks without any keys,

“They’ve made her to do this work, no wonder women were here for that,

My whole generation will die doing this work, i guess” , she laughed loudly,

A laugh with more pain than ecstasy and that wanted her to do all the talkings,

I am cocksure that men will be knocked out easily just by her looks,

“I decided to work here so that rest of my family live peacefully,

But the destiny which trapped me never left my family members too,

Mom in her 48 years and sister in her 20’s followed  my destiny unaware of it’s A or B,

Despite her young age, maturity made her older than her family members,

A maturity brought by her work and  A story  that is tragic,

I wondered whom to be blamed..she? or me? or men like me?,

With a sudden gained thoughts and confidence she spoke further,

And sir ..you who have a decent past, happy present and promising future,

Hunt women for no worthy reason but for bloody lust..

I thank you people for giving us chance to exist in this world,

Though you suck our dignity, respect and comfort destroying our chance to live,

I also thank you for praising us in bed,

But treating as  disgusting figure when you see us in public,

You with your wife and we with our clients,

I also thank you people for not only increasing my survival rate,

But lasciviously went into my family member’s life and still waiting for my daughter to grow up,

And sir…I’ve a few requests to make too,

She is no more a girl with ‘beautiful face’ but with ‘beautiful mind’ ,

“I request you people not to make us work 24×7 As we feel tired despite our biological problems,

I also request you people to treat as with dignity though not like Queen Elizabeth,

But at least like one of those house hold workers,

We kill our lives and become ‘Ravanas’ for your wives to make you ‘Shree Rams’

Remember we, as you call ‘call girls’ have also some needs and dreams,

I request you people to legalise or work like you did some,

Like some liquor brands, harmful drugs and pornography being legal, why not ours?

With some ‘THE CHARTER OF LABOUR ACTS” to  show,

And please rewrite the  indomitable ethics that ‘sex workers’s family also meant to be the same”

Each time, we satisfy our clients and leave out a sigh of relief ,

Aiming for the better future of our daughter who is upto fly high in the sky,

And at last my utmost request is.. Please don’t crush the flower before it blooms because it would never then,

The statuesque beauty finished her upanishad…

Looked at me with more pride – A pride that she deserves to have,

“You have a beautiful ….”, I started to say when she interrupted ,

“Face!..everyone says…so, you wasted your money and time”,

“No…for both ‘A BEAUTIFUL MIND’  you have and i spent mine on something wise,

She laughed louder this time..A laugh that had true meaning and enlightenment,

I forbidden my ‘prostitute princess’ ..she is a heavenly beauty indeed,

I went out of that pimp’s bungalow..gave it my last look,

I wondered whether my prostitute princess’ pleas and dreams would come true,

If not today may be one day.

was 1

THE DAY YOU HELD ME

It was the September night, the day moon looked so happy,

But I could say you are dazed and too weary,

The chaos that still I could hear,

The day you were waiting for your dear,

And yea…It was the September night,

The glittering moon have just started to lose it’s bright,

8:58PM ,8:59PM , 9:00PM….Then you held me so tight,

‘I feel like holding rose petals’, you shouted to the height,

The glittering moon should have lost it’s bright in your pride eyes,

1 2 3….tear drops of yours fell on my cheeks,

You wiped it off with your rosy lips,

Days passed , months shrunken , years grew,

Your dark hair turned pale , you’ve become old and it was true,

‘Things change, separation happens’ , you told laughing,

I was about to leave with my stuffs packing,

‘Did he turn cold hearted? won’t he miss me?’ I asked myself,

‘Time will show him my anguish’, I tried to stop my tears,

‘Shall I drive you to the airport?’, your black eyes were wide,

With July sun so hot, you gave me a cool ride,

Not a word you talked but your eyes did,

All those sweet loves that you hid,

Started to come out ; the sun looked gloomy,

It should have known how much we loved each other dearly,

‘Time to farewell’, you gave me a wide smile,

‘I am gonna miss you’, I wanted to say with few seconds left to go for a mile,

You patted my shoulder as you always do,

You have somehow known that i was expecting a fore head kiss,

After one long calm kiss ”The day I held rose petals”, you said,

”Is coming again , now”, you dashed with my head,

I left you there with lots of unspoken words,

It seemed that you were in no mood to hear as your turned back,

After walking a few steps , my heads turned to seek,

1 2 3 …….Tear drops fell this time on floor which I wished it to be my cheek,

You have been beautifully hiding  your emotions all these days,

Though foot prints and time washed all your feelings, my memories nay,

And today, I remember all those stuffs,

”I don’t want to be missed.I just wanted to be remembered ” you say,

”Missing leaves scar but remembrance brings joy”, you were true I swear,

But I can’t help…’m missing you, your sweet smiles,

Your wise words and thoughtful eyes,

The day you held me, daddy

Though you are not a world leader, war hero or sports star,

The best men ever lived/living, you are my first hero and love,

The day for the first time you held me tight,

Will it come back? no matter how long, I wait.

A DAD IS SON'S FIRST HERO AND DAUGHTER'S FIRST LOVE

A DAD IS SON’S FIRST HERO AND DAUGHTER’S FIRST LOVE

A DAY FOR YOU.

father-and-baby-girl-crying-caucasian2

 

 

 

Dad you were,

There at my birth.

You gave advice for

What it was worth,

You let me decide if,

‘I took it or not,

You never left me,

In an awkward spot,

You stuck up for me,

When i went astray,

So dad , this love is

For you on this FATHERS DAY.